If your partner is depressed…

Obviously, these dynamics can adversely affect you and your marriage.

Here’s what you can do to help yourself while your partner is depressed:

  • Remind yourself it’s the depression acting up, not your partner.
  • Be careful not to sacrifice your own life; stick to your usual routine.
  • Accept all the support you can get and be sure to have someone, maybe a supportive therapist with whom you can talk.
  • Get out of the house; don’t get isolated
  • Stay healthy: eat right and exercise.
  • Try not to take responsibility for your partner’s moods; realize you are neither the cause nor will you be the savior.

Now what can you do to help your partner?

  • Highlight the times when he or she is not sad.
  • Allow your partner to experience sadness.
  • Help your partner re-remember the best aspects of themselves (past, present and future.)
  • If your partner is not in the mood to socialize, alleviate the pressure by negotiating a walk instead.
  • Be available to listen.
  • Most importantly, give your spouse time.

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